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CCTI
Memorize This Stuff!!
| Question | Answer |
|---|---|
| Honorable Chief, Exalted Senior Chief, Illustrious Master Chief (Your Nineness) may I have the priviledge of introducing my humble self? | I am E7 Duhaime, I have been selected to become a member of the ahllowed fraternity of Chief Petty Officer of the United..SCG. |
| Whereas, honorable one, I am not yet wise enough to be called a Chief. | I ask of you and your brothers and sisters to indulge me with the teachings from your vast storehouse of knowledge on all worldly things... |
| so that I may be mentally prepared to walk near your side in the future. | Would you please, honorable one, do me the honor of making an entry into my "Charge Book?" |
| Bullet #1 | The Judge is a candy ass! |
| Bullet #2 | If brains were dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to load a firecracker! |
| Bullet #3 | If bullshit were electricity, I'd make the Hoover Dam look like a battery! |
| Bullet #4 | If I can't hack it as a Chief, I'll submit my chit for OCS! |
| Bullet #5 | All Master Chiefs are hemorrhoids! |
| Bullet #6 | The CMC can suck a golf ball through a garden hose! |
| Bullet #7 | My sponsor is an asshole! |
| Bullet #8 | Warrant Officers couldn't hack it as a Chief. |
| Bullet #9 | All Senior Chiefs wear depends! |
| Bullet #10 | The jury is full of liars! |
| "What time is it?" | Due to the fallacious nature of my chronometer and the inability of my cerebrum to function in the manner of an august CPO, I am unable to ascertain |
| "Time?"... I am unable to ascertain | the correct time to a punctilious degree. However, it is my opinion that the appx military time is _______ hours. |
| "How high is up?" | Up is equal to the amplitude, but in the opposite direction to the delineation of down and is used in such phrases as, Go piss up a rope, up your ass, and you're all hosed up, Chief. |
| "How long have you been in the Coast Guard?" | POPEYE:All me bloomin life Chief! Me mudder was a mermaind, me fadder was King Neptune. I was borne on the crest of a wave and rocked in the cradle of the deep. |
| "How long?"... in the cradle of the deep. | Barnacle and kelp is me cloths, seaweed is me hair. Every bone in me body is pure sugar and when I spits, I spits pure tar! I is tough, I is, I am, I are! Grrrrrr! |
| "How smart is a Boot Chief? | Bend over, hands on knees: "About as smart as the pimple on me butt!" |
| "What is the lowest thing on earth?" | A Boot Chief is the lowest thing on earth. He is lower than a whale's midnight soil that resides in the abyss of the deepest ocean! |
Created by:
aduhaime
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