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Getting to Yes - Ury
Know these cards, you'll know the book
| Question | Answer |
|---|---|
| 3 Requirements of a Negotiation | Wise Agreement, Efficient, Improve/not damage relationship |
| 3 reasons why unwise to use 'Positional Bargaining' | 1 - Locks positions 2 - Identify ego with problem (saving face) 3 - Becomes less focused on underlying concerns (the 'why' behind the position) |
| 3 Reasons why 'Positional Bargaining' endangers the relationship | 1) becomes a battle of wills and power 2) Position are hard to change 3) Bending to other's will feels bad because of resentment and anger |
| Two interests of every negotiator | 1) Relationship (usually more important) 2) Object of negotiation |
| What happens when the two interest of negotiation conflict? | Positional Bargaining takes place. Trade off starts between the two with your results. |
| What do you do when the conflict is because of the people and not object of negotiation? | Separate them... Deal with the people problem separately. Theirs, and yours. |
| How to resolve the people problem of 'Perception' (5) | Put yourself in their shoes. Discuss perceptions. Look for opportunities to act differently than their perceptions. Give them stake in the outcome so they participate. Ensure they save face in the end. |
| How to resolve the people problem of 'Emotion' (5) | Aware (theirs, yours, write it down), Make explicit (facts of why), Allow other side to let off steam, Don't react to outbursts, Use symbolic gestures (Note, gift, ect) |
| How to resolve the people problem of 'Communication' (4) | Listen Actively (and rephrase their case to show you both understand), Speak to be understood (not a debate), Speak about yourself (what/why you feel), Speak with a purpose |
| How to prevent the people problem of 'Communication' (2) | Build a working relationship (know other side personally), Face the problem not the people (sit same side of the table) |
| Difference between positions and interests? | Positions - 'What' you decide Interests - 'Why' you decide |
| True or false, There are many solutions that can satisfy an interest? | True - multiple positions can satisfy an interest (but not vice/versa). |
| 3 types of interests behind a position | 1) Shared Interests 2) Conflicting Interests (Usually makes agreement possible, conflicting why's) 3)Different (neutral) |
| How to identify interests (4) | Ask (why, why not), Each side has multiple interests, Basic human needs, make a list |
| When do people listen better? | After you have acknowledge their interests. |
| How to communicate you understand interests | 1) Put the problem before the answer |
| Obstacles that prevent new options of mutual gain (4) | Premature judgment (stops imagination), fear (disclosure of real intentions), Assumption of a fixed pie (win/lose), Thinking that Solving their problem is only their problem |
| Prescription to the problems of inventing new options | Separate inventing options from judging, Broaden your options (don't search for single answer), Look for mutual gains, Make their decision easy |
| How to brainstorm ideas for inventing new options, BEFORE you start (5): | Define purpose, Few participants, Change Environment Informal Atmosphere Facilitator |
| How to brainstorm ideas for inventing new options, DURING session (4): | Sit side by side facing the problem, Clarify ground rules (no criticism), Brainstorm, Record all ideas |
| How to brainstorm ideas for inventing new options, AFTER session (3): | Most promising ideas Rank and Improve, Decide on best idea, Set time limit |
| A good way to broaden your options (2) | 1) Circle Chart, 2) Looking through the eyes of a different experts |
| Circle chart steps | 1) Problem, what's wrong? 2) Analysis, sort symptoms. 3) Approaches to solve. 4) Action ideas, specific steps to take. |
| How to look for Mutual Gains (3) | Identify shared interests, Agreement often based on disagreement on perceptions, Ask for their preference |
| How to find agreement based on disagreement on perceptions | Different: Beliefs, Values in time, forcasts, aversion to risk, something better for everyone. (Disagreements allow for different values to be placed) |
| Why ask for their preference in interests? | To present lots of options and letting them choose (all acceptable to you). |
| How to make their decision easy | Whose shoes? What decision? Make offers (not threats). Consider how they will be criticized if they adopt your offer. |
| Whose Shoes? | Focus on ONE person. Nobody deals with an abstract entity. |
| What Decision? | Give them an answer... not a problem. Easy to say "YES" not easy to think of answer on spot. Make answer an easy "YES" |
| How to consider how they might be criticized if they adopted your offer | Imagine the other side's most 'Powerful' Critic |
| Why should you insist on using 'objective criteria' | Deciding on will is costly, efficient, fair standards, fair procedures, Frame each issue as a joint search for objective criteria, reason, never yield to pressure |
| Types of pressure you may receive in negotiation (3) | Bribe, threat, manipulative appeal to trust |
| Strategies for dealing with pressure in a negotiation (3) | Invite them to reveal reasoning, suggest objective criteria, refuse to budge except with reasoning. |
Created by:
relationshipally
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