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Habit 4
Flashcard method study guide for Habit 4.
Win-Lose | High on courage, low on consideration. You can't win unless other people lose. |
Lose-Win | Low on courage, high on consideration. Insecure. Not brave enough to stick up for yourself/doormat |
Lose-Lose | Low on courage and consideration. If you can't win, nobody wins. |
Win-Win or No Deal | Ready to walk away before someone lose - including yourself. Perfect balance of courage and consideration. |
EBA | Emotional Bank Account(s) |
Emotional Bank Account(s) | Relationship - bank account that you can make (emotional) deposits and withdrawals |
Find out what a deposit is for the other person. | What you think is a deposit for another person could actually be a withdrawal in their mind. |
Do small acts of kindness. | Take the initiative to treat people with kindness. |
Keep promises. | If you don’t keep promises, this is a big withdrawal of EBA. This breaks trust. |
Keep confidences. | When someone shares something with you in confidence, keep it that way. |
Be loyal to the absent. | Avoid gossiping or backbiting. Do not negatively talk about someone who isn't there. |
Set clear expectations. | Don't leave room for second guessing. Clearly set expectations and follow through on what's expected. |
Apologize. | If you're in the wrong, or were, admit it now. Making excuses instead of making things better turns into an even bigger withdrawal. |
Forgive. | Learn to forgive and to forget so that you don't keep hurting yourself the way you were hurt. |
Rule 1 for making deposits | A deposit is only a deposit if the other person sees it as one. |
Rule 2 for making deposits | It can take one or more deposits to make up for one withdrawal. |