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Ch 11: Relationships
Adult Development
| Question | Answer |
|---|---|
| Sternberg Love Components | 1. passion: intense physiological desire for someone 2. intimacy: feeling you can share all your thoughts and actions with another 3. commitment: willingness to stay with a person through good and bad times --Balance of components shifts over time |
| What is love like early in relationship? | -passion is high but intimacy and commitment is low |
| Infatuation | short-lived. Doesn't have trust, honesty, openness, acceptance associated with romantic love |
| Combos of love: Non love | Way u feel about cashier at grocery store |
| Liking | Good friends who have lunch together once or twice a week. Intimacy present, but not passion or commitment |
| Infatuated Love | A fling or short term relationship based on sexual attraction. Passion is only present |
| Empty love | An arranged marriage or couple who have decided to stay together for sake of the kids. Only commitment present |
| Romantic Love | A couple who have happily dated for a few months but have not made any plans for a future together. All but commitment. |
| Companionate Love | Couple who enjoy eachothers company and relationship, although they don't have sexual interest anymore. Intimacy and commitment but no passion |
| Fatuous Love | Couple who decides to move in together after knowing each other for 2 weeks. Passion and commitment but no intimacy |
| Consummate Love | A loving sexually vibrant, long term relationship. Has passion, commitment, and intimacy |
| Number of Partners for Men | Men have more sexual partners and report more sexual activity. For both genders, most have just one sexual partner at a time |
| Quality of Sex | Married couples report a small decline over the course of marriage. Married women report somewhat less satisfaction |
| Rate of sex in middle aged couples | On average, married middle-aged couples have sex about once a week and report that they would have sex more often if they were not so busy and tired from their jobs and raising kids |
| Why declines in sexual interest and activity? (Male) | Physiological changes: slower to arousal, slower to ejaculate, and slower to recover after ejaculation partially due to reduced levels of sex hormones |
| Why declines in sexual interest and activity? (Female) | slower to become sexually excited and possible discomfort associated with decreased lubrication that occurs as estrogen levels drop with menopause |
| Stereotypes of older adults | sexless or asexual. Infirmity: poor physical and mental health Internalized ageism: suppress desire due to social attitudes No bicycle: lack of a willing, desirable partner, especially for elderly women, there are not enough older men. more STIs |
| Sex and Happiness in Adults in General | Happiness is correlated with frequency of sexual encounters in adults; marital happiness is strongly linked with sexual satisfaction. The effect is greater in men. |
| Sex and Happiness in Older Adults | Both better physical health and higher levels of sexual frequency were linked to higher levels of marital satisfaction. Men tended to be happier and healthier when having sex frequently, although the findings still held true for older women. |
| An experimental study on frequency of sex and happiness (Loewenstein, Krishnamurti, Kopsic, McDonald, 2015) | No relationship between the frequency of sex and the degree of happiness. |
| Unmarried Parents? | In 2007, 40% of births were to unmarried women |
| Reasons for Cohabitation (Part-time/limited, Premarital, Substitute) | Convenience, sharing expenses, sexual accessibility. Long-term commitment that is a marriage in fact, but lacking official sanction |
| Who is most likely to divorce? | People that select partner for more permanent relationship (marriage) during height of infatuation |
| Lemiux & Hale study | Such trends hold in romantically involved couples between 17 and 75 years of age. As length of relationship increases, intimacy and passion decreases, BUT commitment increases |
| Assortative Mating Theory | States that people find partners based on their similarity to each other. Occurs along many dimensions (education, religious beliefs, physical traits, age, socioeconomic status, intelligence, and political ideology) |
| Kalmijn & Flap (2011) | Found meeting at schools was most likely to result in most forms of homogamy (degree to which ppl are similar) |
| Speed dating | Provide way to meet several people in short period of time. Practiced most by young adults. Popularity of online dating means increasing number of ppl meet this way |
| How many people in U.S. meet online? | Nearly 1 in every 5 couples in U.S. meet online (compared with 1 in 10 in Aus and 1 in 20 in Spain and UK) |
| Strongest influence in selections online? | Physical attractiveness |
| Increasing trend? | Hookup culture of casual sex. 3/4 of men and women express some level of regret over hookup sex |
| Schmitt (2004) Conclusion? no one pattern hold across for all | Studied 62 cultural regions. Showed secure romantic attachment was the norm in 80% of cultures. Preoccupied romantic attachment was common in East Asian cultures |
| How has culture shaped mate selection choices? | Across 48 cultures, people from cultures that have good health care, education, resources and permit to choose mates develop more secure attachments |
| In what country is loyalty to family important? | India. 95% of marriages arranged here |
| Islamic societies? | Use matchmaking as way to preserve family consistency |
| Abusive relationship | when one person becomes aggressive toward their partner. Received increased attention since early 1980s when U.S. Criminal justice system ruled that under some circumstances, abusive relationships can be used as explanation for one's behavior |
| Battered woman syndrome | occurs when woman believes she cant leave abusive situation and may even go as far as to kill her abusive |
| Who is at high risk of abuse? | females, latinas, African Americans having atypical family structure (something other than 2 biological parents), having more romantic partners, early onset of sexual activity, & victim of child abuse |
| National rate of sexual assault? | Overall, national rates of sexual assault have decreased more than 60 % since early 1990s BUT date rape still risk. College women 4 times more likely. 40% experience abuse in dating |
| O Leary (1993) | Argue for continuum of aggressive behaviors toward partner: verbally aggressive, physically aggressive, severe physical aggression (murder) |
| Stats on physical abuse? | Each year, about 5 million women and 3 million men experience partner related physical assaults and rape in U.S. Wordwide- btwn 10% and 69% of women report being physically assaulted or raped |
| Underlying causes of aggressive behavior | Anger and hostility in perpetrator associated with various forms of physical abuse, exact nature remains elusive tho |
| Men and aggression? | Men also victims of violence but only 1/3 the rate of women |
| Culture and abuse | Common place violent practice against women that include sexual slavery, female genital cutting, intimate partner violence and honor killing. Rates of abuse higher in cultures that emphasize female purity, male status, and honor |
| Violence in China? | Intimate partner violence prevalent in China |
| Physical abuse | use of physical force that may result in bodily injury, physical pain or impairment |
| Sexual abuse | nonconsensual sexual contact of any kind |
| Emotional or physical abuse | infliction of anguish, pain or distress |
| Financial or material exploitation | illegal or improper use of an older adult's funds, property or assets |
| Abandonment | desertion of an older adult by an individual who had physical custody |
| Neglect | refusal or failure to fulfill any part of a person's obligation or duties to an older adult |
| Self- neglect | behaviors of an older person that threaten his or her own health or safety, excluding those conscious and voluntary decisions by a mentally competent and health adult |
| DePaulo (2006) | points out numerous and biases against single ppl. Adults characterized married ppl as caring, kind, and giving abt 50% of time compared with only 2 % for single ppl. Found rental agents preferred married couples 60% of time |
| Do men marry at a later age than women? | Yes. Fewer men than women remain unmarried throughout adulthood, b.c. men find partners more easily as they select from a larger age range of unmarried women |
| Ethnic differences in singlehood | Nearly twice as many African Americans are single during young adulthood as Euro Americans. Also increasing among Latinos in U.S. b/c of their poor economic opportunity |
| Cohabitation increased from 523,000 to 5.5 mil in 2002 | People in committed, intimate, sexual relationships but who are not married may decide living together provides way to share daily life. ppl w. lower education levels cohabit more |
| Reasons for cohabitation? | testing relationship for marriage, convenience as an alternative to marriage. |
| Culture and Cohabitation | 99% of married couples in Sweden do this before marriage. |
| Gay men and sex | Separate love and sex and have more short term relationships. Lesbians tend to make commitment and cohabit faster than heterosexual couples |
| Gays and support | Couples report receiving less support from family members than either married or cohabiting couples |
| Marital success | umbrella term referring to any marital outcome (such as divorce rate) |
| Marital quality | subjective evaluation of couple's relationship on number of different dimensions |
| Marital adjustment | Degree spouses accomodate each other over certain period of time |
| marital satisfaction | global assessment of one's marriage |
| Key factors that predict marriage | 1. Age. Younger partners are, lower odds marriage will last, especially when people are in teens or early 20s. Financial security and pregnancy. 2. Homogamy- similarity of values and interests couples share (same age, values, goals, attitudes, etc) |
| Key factors that predict marriage continued... | 3. Feeling that the relationship is equal |
| Exchange theory | marriage is based on each partner contributing something to the relationship the other would be hard pressed to provide. Satisfying marriages = both partners perceive fair exchange in all dimensions of relationship |
| Important factors in relationship? | Married couples in U.S. and Iran say trust, consulting, honesty, making joint decisions, and commitment |
| Pattern in Marital satisfaction? | -Marital satisfaction highest at beginning of marriage, falls until children leave and rises again later in life. for some couples, satisfaction remains low forever |
| What is pattern determined by ? | By nature of dependence of each spouse on the other. When ' ' is mutual, marriage is strong. when dependence is unbalanced = stress and conflict |
| vulnerability stress adaptation model | Sees marital quality as a dynamic process resulting from couple's ability to handle stressful events in context of their vulnerabilities and resources. As couples ability to adapt to stressful situations gets better, quality of marriage will improve |
| Early marriage | -must learn to adjust to diff perceptions and expectation each has of one another. happy couples focus on good aspects, not annoyances |
| Empty nest | marital satisfaction improves after children leave |
| Married singles | may have grown apart but continue to live together -emotionally divorced. middle aged. |
| Marital satisfaction in older couples | -fairly high. describe partner in more positive terms. increases shortly after retirement but decreases with health problems and age and is related to perceived support each partner receives. Positively related to degree of social engagement with friends |
| Benefits of marriage in late life? | -helps ppl deal better w/ chronic illness, functional problems and disabilities |
| Divorce rate in U.S? | Higher than most countries. 50/50 chance of remaining married -African American and Asian American couples tend to be married longer at time of divorce than European American couples and ethnically mixed marriages are at greater risk. high ed =low d rate |
| Gottman and Levenson (2004) -important because it shows how couples show emotion is critical to marital success | Two models that predict early divorce (within 1st 7 yrs of marriage & when kid turns 14) with 93% accuracy over 14 yr period of the study. Neg emotions displayed during conflict predicted early divorce. Shows how couples show emotion is critical to suc |
| wife-demand-husband-withdraw Ex. wife talking excitedly about project she had just been given at work and her husband showing disinterest | during conflict, wife places demand on husband who withdraws either emotionally or physically. Lack of positive emotions in discussion of events and during conflict predicted later divorce, but not early divorce |
| Couples who divorce early? | high levels of negative feelings, contempt, criticism, defensiveness etc. |
| Covenant marriage | makes divorce harder to obtain |
| Healthy Marriage Initiative | marriage education programs. approach based on ideas that more couples are prepared for marriage, the better the relationship will survive over the long run |
| How long do men/women wait to remarry? | Typically wait about 3.5 years before they remarry BUT varies across ethnic groups. African Americans remarry a bit more slowly than other groups |
| Who is more likely to initiate divorce? | Women, but less likely to remarry unless they are poor. BUT women in general benefit more from remarriage than men, especially if they have children |
| Who is more likely to be widowed? | Women. more than half of women age 65 widows, but only 15% of men the same age are widowers. Can expect to live 10 yrs as a widow |
| nuclear family | Most common form of family in western society, consisting of parent(s) and child(ren). |
| extended family | most common family form around the world in which grandparents and other relatives live with parents and children. |
| How expensive is a child? | $206,000 for food, shelter, and other necessities by the time child turns 17. College expenses additional |
| Benefits of not having children? | higher marital satisfaction, more freedom and higher standards of living. Nearly 41% of mom's unmarried |
| Ethnic background and family structure? | African American husbands more likely than European American counterparts to help with household chores, regardless of their wives employment status |
| Familism | refers to idea that well being of family takes precedence over concerns of individual family members |
| Kinkeeper | person who gathers family members together for celebrations and keeps them in touch with each other |
| Sandwich generation | because they are caught between the competing demands of two generations:their parents and their children |
| filial obligation | adult children feel a sense of responsibility to care for their parents if necessary |