Exam 1
Quiz yourself by thinking what should be in
each of the black spaces below before clicking
on it to display the answer.
Help!
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| 3 Questions to think about regarding boundaries. | How do you know when they have been crossed? How do you respond? How should you respond?
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| Name 2 things that makes conversations difficult. | Unpleasant reaction/uncertain outcomes (Example - neighbor's dog barks at night)
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| What are the 3 parts of the structure of a difficult conversation? | What happened - Feelings - Identity
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| Name 5 parts of the "what happened" conversation. | What happened/what should have happened/who's right/who did what/who's to blame
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| Name 3 parts of the "feelings" conversation. | What's felt/express//deny?
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| Name 3 parts of the "identity" conversation. | What does this mean to who I am? My selfworth? My worth in the yes of others?
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| Name 2 examples of how a message delivery attitude that can lead to a destructive conversation | Goal is to show the other person they are WRONG and get them to take responsibility/may want to tell them how to fix the situation or themselves
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| Give 3 examples of how a problem solving attitude leas to a productive conversation | Increase each party's understanding of situation/maintain or enhance the relationship as well as individual well-being/move toward problem-solving and how to improve situation
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| What determines the difference between destructive and constructive conflict? | Communication determines the type of conflict.
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| List two points about the Truth Assumption. | We think we have all needed info/leads to arguing our conclusion
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| Name three things that can go wrong in a "What Happened" conversation? | BIT - Blame, Intention, Truth`
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| Name 3 points about blame. | Counter to understanding, hinders problem solving, can hinder problem detection
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| Name 2 ways we should deal with blame. | Switch to contribution instead of blame. Focus on the future, learning, and change.
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| Name 3 things that often happen in the "what happened" conversation. | CAB - Conclusions, Arguing, Blaming
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| Where do you want to get to in a "what happened" conversation? | Move from certainty to curiosity/ASK ABOUT THEIR STORY/separate intent from impact/look forward tith contribution/change roles
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| Name 4 things that often happen in the feelings conversation. | Judgments, Attributions, Characterizations, Problem solving
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| Where do you want to get to in the feelings conversations (3 things)? | Express full spectrum of feelings/express without judgement or blame/listen and acknowledge
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| Name 1-4 out of 8 Communication Tools for Conflict | I statements/XYZ statements/Appropriate questions/Reflective listening
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| Name 5-8 Communications Tools for Conflict | Nonverbal cues of interest and openness/relationsal statements/internal sumaries of progress/reframing
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| What does reframing mean? | Neutralizing venomous comments
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| What is often the reason we may fear conflict? | Identity. Ami I competent? A good person? Worthy? Similar to concept of face.
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| Name 3 points about vulnerable identities. | I don't make mistakes/I didn't contribute to this problem/My intentions are pure and simple.
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| Ways to deal with Identity issues: | Plan ahead: know yourself/detach
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| Name 3 points about distributive justice. | Equity/equality/need
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| What does procedural justice deal with? | Process
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| What does social exchange theory deal with? | Reciprocity in relationship (e.g. Donald Trumpe and Melania)
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| Name two points about social exchange theory. | Social interaction is likened to transactions in economic marketplace/ Exchange is a theory which attempts to explain interpersonal behaviors in terms of the exchange of rewards and costs
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| Name 3 more points about Social Exchange Theory (FCE). | Focus on what people put into and get out of a relationship/ Centers on dyads, but looks at some more complicated forms as well/ everything we do has costs (to be minimized) and rewards (to be maximized) associated.
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| Define rewards. | Anything that a person gains from a relation.
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| What are 6 main rewards? | Love, money, status, info, goods, services
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| What are relational costs? | Negative consequences of a relation
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| What are 3 main relational costs? | Time, energy, emotional upset
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| Name 3 points about social exchange theory and conflict. | Exchange does not have to be in kind/ mutually beneficial relations lead to liking/ when exchange is perceived as unfair by one party, conflict can result
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| Define Equity Theory | Based on social exchange theory. Focuses on people's feelings of how fairly they have been treated in comparison with the treatment received by others (inputs and outcomes).
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